The Blessed 5-2

I'm 52 years-old today. Life has been super life-y this past year. I'm celebrating the good stuff and even the stuff that feels less than good because it's all part of the big, gorgeous, mess.

Yesterday, I went to lunch at my favorite LA-vegan-hippie-woowoo restaurant with my friend Karen. At this place they always ask a "question of the day." It's not an extemporaneous test, thank goodness. The server doesn't wait for an answer, just poses the question. Over the years, I've been asked what inspires me, what I am grateful for, and what do I delight in. It's all kind of ridiculous but I always answer the question in my head, because why not?

Yesterday our server, Cory, tossed off a question that felt deeper than usual. "What is your mission?" he asked. In between lunch and my on-the-house birthday dessert, it suddenly got real at our table. That question felt too deep for a quick one-word answer. I thought about it on the drive home. What was my mission?

Back when I was 46, I celebrated 23 years of sobriety. Because I was 23 years-old at the time I got sober, it meant that on that day at 46, I had been sober for half of my life. A young woman who knew I was celebrating my sobriety that day asked me, "How does it feel to have lived half your life in grace?" Her question took my breath away.

I've decided that my mission will be to live my life in grace. Under that umbrella of grace is love, kindness, forgiveness, patience, acceptance, and gratitude. I will absolutely fail sometimes, but grace will be there, ready to be claimed at each new moment, whenever I'm ready.