Named

"Mom? I have a new middle name I made up for myself."

"What's that?"

"Jay, Master of Lightning."

"Like in your Ninjago Legos?"

"Yeah. My full name is Robert Edward Jay Master of Lightning Lego Zone Rosenberg."

"I like it."

Check, Please

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"Here you go, Sir." The waiter winked as he set down Bob's plate.

"Thank you." Bob waited until the waiter walked away and then whispered, "Mom, shouldn't I tell him my real name?"

Things I Learned During 4 Days Without Electricity

We got off lucky with the giant wind storm that ravaged our town last week. We didn't lose our cars or home as some did. All we lost was our electricity. I am grateful to all of the friends and family who offered their electrified homes for our use, but hanging out in our cold, dark pad for a few days, I learned some things.

1. If everyone and the pets sleep inside the Star Wars fort on the bed, it is warmer than sleeping in that same bed sans fort. Nevertheless, the experience is a reminder of why winter camping is best avoided.

2. If your kid is sick and you try to use an electronic thermometer to take his temperature, it will malfunction if the room you are in is colder than 65 degrees. You might not know this so you will think the thermometer is broken and brave a late night Rite Aid run for a new thermometer and then the new one won't work either for that same reason. Also consider reading the manual the first time you buy one of those fancy thermometers, Hot Pants.

3. However many battery operated lanterns you have will not provide enough light to pluck your eyebrows with any degree of accuracy. Related: I would be the first one kicked off Survivor.

4. If you are behind on the laundry when the power goes out, by day four you will find yourself wearing tan dress slacks and a child's size 6 Gryffindor t-shirt.

5. If you drive three towns over to an open Target to buy a warm hat, four different people will comment that the new hat makes you look like a 1970's Mary Tyler Moore. You will decide to take this as a compliment and later ask Mr. Grant for a raise because you've got spunk.

6. Buying one of those solar powered cell phone chargers would have been a good way to spend a few bucks two weeks ago.

7. If you don't open your fridge for four days when the power is off, when you finally open the door, you will get the smells you deserve.

Batten down everyone, it's winter or something.

Smacksy Sunday Links

The tiny origami apartment is super cool. Where would I put all my books?

How handy is this?

And one minute and nineteen seconds of swinging bulldogs.

Happy Sunday.

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Uh... Yeah

No really, I meant to wear my bedroom slippers to Bob's swim class today.

What You Get With a Lights Off Day by Bob Rosenberg

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1. You get to stay home because school is canceled because there was a giant wind that stopped the electricity and you can't even watch Cyber Chase because the TV needs the electricity.

2. You get to set up your Clone Wars tent on the bed and use the camping lantern.

3. You get to listen to Christmas music on the battery radio.

4. You get to go for a walk and see a ton of sticks everyplace.

5. You get a hot lunch of a quesadilla with lots of fridge leftovers in it.

6. You get to stay in pajamas all day even for the walk and it's kind of the best day ever.

Backstage Pass

This morning, Bob emerged from his room wearing sweatpants, a striped t-shirt, and rain boots.

"Hey, Mom? I have a question for you."

"Okay."

"Do I look like a rock star?"