Wednesday, August 19, 2009

The Family Tree: A One Act


THE FAMILY TREE
(11:15 AM. BOB and I are walking home from the park.)

BOB
Uncle Dave is my wife and also Daisy is my wife and we are married?


ME
Uncle Dave is our friend and Daisy is your dog.


BOB
Adam from the park is my nephew?


ME
Adam from the park is your friend and you do not have a nephew.


BOB
Mama is my married wife and also my horse Wallace is my sister?


I am married to daddy and Wallace is a nice horse doll.


BOB
Teddy is married to Daisy and I am also having a wife with Kelly from my summer school who is my wife and I am her grandma and daughter-nephew.


ME
I don’t know even know where to go with that.


BOB
Grandma Sylvia has grapes? She is grapes, Grandma Sylvia?


ME
Great Grandma Sylvia. Great not grapes.


BOB
She is great, grapes-grandma Sylvia.


ME
Yes she is.


END SCENE

6 comments:

  1. Of course it helps that I know Bob, but I was still weeping with laughter at this one. The kid is going to have his own TV show, mark my words.

    I don't know where to go with this either except straight to hilarity!

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  2. And of course Miss Ilene is still Bob's "tiny grapefruit."

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  3. I love the Bob! It must be in the air. Last night my 3 year old said "Mommy I want to marry you but I can't this week cause I have to play golf with Uncle Randy".

    Karen Peterson

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  4. With hard work and a open minds someday Uncle Dave will be able to be a wife.

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  5. I do hope you told Grandma Sylvia that she is grapes! She would love that. Aunt/wife/daughter/niece Jill.

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  6. I was reading this with my tiny son asleep on my chest. Well, he WAS asleep until i guffawed right in his ear. He didn't seem too amused.

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