Fiesta de Los Gatos

"Dad? How is Violet supposed to celebrate a cat birthday with only humans?"

"You think she should have a cat party?"

"Yeah. Maybe Miss Belva could bring Cindy from next door and Mee Mee could bring Marty over."

"That would be pretty crazy. Would they have cat birthday cake?"

"Cat cake is made out of turkey. We can make it. It's what Vi's wants."

All right, already

"Mom? Did they have Legos when you were around?"

"I am around."

"I mean when you were around and young."

Squeezeable

"Mom? You just kissed me like this ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch ch. Like that."

"I had a lot of kisses to get out there."

"It was like a kisses machine or maybe a kisses canon."

"How can you blame me? Those cheeks!"

"You're a canon, Mom."

Smacksy Sunday Links

This is super cool.

Another thing that is cool - you can also click to pan and zoom.

Kristen Howerton reads her beautiful piece, The Trauma of Sports from Listen T0 Your Mother LA.

Happy Sunday.

Smacksy Saturday Photo: 5pm

Daisy at her evening post, waiting for Mr. Rosenberg to walk in the door.

Perspective

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"Mom? Guess what I ate today?"

"Tell me."

"I had a tomato."

"You did? How was it?"

"I still don't like them but they are okay so I ate it."

"That's exciting!"

"Well, it was a tomato, Mom, not the whole universe."

Classic

"Bob, that's enough with the whining."

"But please, Mom? You're being the meanest mom in the whole wide world!"

"You're behaving like a little bratty guy."

"Mom! Don't call me little!"

Dry Run

"Bud? Next week we're going to walk to school a couple of times to see how long it takes us."

"So we're ready for school?"

"Yeah, that way we'll know what time we have to leave in the mornings."

"Am I going to ride my scooter?"

"That'll be good most days. On days that it's wet out we should walk."

"With umbrellas?"

"Yep."

"Or if there's thunder and lightning we can take the car?"

"Sure, Bob."

"And if we're fire fighters we can take a fire truck."

Check Up

"Mom? Why was Douglas from around the block at my dentist appointment?"

"He just happened to be at the dentist office for his appointment at the same time you were."

"But he watched my whole appointment."

"I think he wanted to see how a big boy like you acts at the dentist, Bob."

"I think he just wanted to watch that Winnie the Pooh movie that was on the TV in the ceiling over my lay-back chair."

My Moves

"Hey, Mom? Want to see my new move? It's kind of like a yoga and karate move put together and if I can keep this one foot over there and hold my arm up like this, see? Wait, see? No wait, hold on, see? Not that one. Did you see that other one? I'm okay but did you see that one? Okay watch this. See my up arm? And move done! I know, awesome move."

Smacksy Sunday Links

Loved this over at Brene Brown's site this week.

I'd like to walk through these rooms.

Do you know the phenomenal Jessica Bern? You should. Don't miss her Listen To Your Mother LA reading, One and Done.

Happy Sunday.

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Retro Bob

Mr. Rosenberg and Elfin-Euro Bob

A What?

"Mom? What is this thing?"

"It's a thing people used to use to write letters and books and things before we had home computers.

"I don't get it. Why didn't anyone want to have a computer?"

"They weren't available. Computers haven't been around that long."

"Yeah, but you have, Mom."

"Thanks, Bob."

Things That Are Great

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"Mom? I need to tell you something."

"Okay."

"It's serious."

"What's up?"

"I decided that one of the best things of things that are great is clean laundry that's all warm and putting your face all on it."

Games

"Mom? You want to play a game?"

"Sure."

"I've got a good idea."

"Candy Land?"

"No, I was thinking about Hunter Jungle Spies Army Attack Team."

"I haven't heard of that one."

"I just made it up and it's awesome."

Wherein I'm Called Out For Passive-Aggressive Behavior

"Mom? Can I have one more show, please?"

"No, Bob."

"What was that sound?"

"That sound you made like, 'whhhhhhhhhh.' Like that."

"That was a sigh. I was feeling tired of you asking me for shows."

"You should use your words, Mom."

To Be Five Years Old

"Mom!"

"Yeah, Babe?"

"I opened the car window! It's like flying!"

Smacksy Sunday Links

Fascinating excerpts from James Mollison's photography book, Where Children Sleep. (Scroll to the bottom of the article and find the slide show.)

You know I love me a good dog video. This is :14 seconds of goodness.

And from Listen To Your Mother LA, "Cheese" by Cheryl Rosenberg.

Happy Sunday.

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Retro Bob

Those cheeks. I mean, come on.

Shoppers

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"So, Bob? I asked at the Lego store and that scary Halloween set isn't in yet. They're not sure when it will be in."

"That's okay, Dad. I'm not worried."

"Good."

"It doesn't matter if the store has it yet because I know they'll sell it to Santa."

Scented

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"Mom? You smell bath-ful."

"What's that?"

"Like baths."

"So, that's a good thing?"

"It's way better than bath-less."

Rounds

"What's over there, Mom?"

"You mean the tomatoes?"

"Yeah, but what are the other ones?"

"Looks like... plums."

"I know why Daddy put those together."

"Why is that?"

"I think because he's really into eating things that are circles all together on the same plate."

"That's possible."

"But the plate's not a circle so I'll think about it some more and get back to you."

It Was a Monday

"Mom? Why did you stop? Why are you talking to that policeman?"

"He pulled us over for having expired registration."

"Why is it expired?"

"Because our fifteen year-old car wouldn't pass a smog check so we had a new catalytic converter put in but then it still wouldn't pass a smog check because we have to drive the car ninety miles to re-set the computer and apparently we've only driven about forty miles so far and I couldn't tell because our odometer doesn't work and also I didn't have our updated insurance in the car and mommy was irresponsible and didn't start this process three months ago when she should have."

"Mom? You have something in your nose."

"Nice. Thanks for telling me, Bob."

"Mom? Where did you put it?"

"Put what?"

"The thing you just took out of your nose?"

Day Tripping

"We've been driving a long time, Dad."

"It's only been about eight minutes."

"Are we closer to our house or Lego Land, right now?"

"Right now we're closer to the house."

"How about now?"

"It's going to take a couple of hours, Bob."

"Dad? Now are we closer to Lego Land than the house?"

"No, but we're pointed in the right direction."

"You should hurry, Dad. All the Legos are waiting for us."

Smacksy Sunday Links

Take the time to look up close at some of these. (I think the chicken is my favorite.)

I can't stop watching this.

And from Listen To Your Mother LA, the captivating Mother F@%er by Jenica Bergere.

Happy Sunday.

Smacksy Saturday Photo

Remember that time Bob got really emotionally attached to that acorn squash? Good times.

Sorting: Day 5

Note: Sometimes after five days of sorting Legos by shape and type, your son may decide that it's better to dump all of the Legos back into one big bin.

Checking In

"How was your day, Dad? Was it disturbing? Embarrassing? Confusing?"

"No, none of those. Maybe a little tiring."

"Oh. That's pretty good then. Let's have a snappy dinner."

"What's a snappy dinner?"

"It means really good. I'm really good, Dad."

Lost and Found

"Hey, Mom? I'm showing you this."

"What is that?"

"I don't know. I found it in the couch."

"It looks kind of yucky."

"Yeah and guess what? I didn't even eat it!"

Sorting - Day 2

I mean seriously, you guys didn't think this was over in one day, did you? And the Lego pile looks smaller, right? Right?

Somebody's Gotta Do It

"We're making progress here, Bob."

"We are?"

"We'll get these Legos all sorted out."

"Okay... So, Dad? If I was you, where would I put this blue one?"