Forgiveness

"It's not a stick, Mom. It's a blaster weapon stick."

"Mama? How about I watch just one more show? I haven't seen that Kai Lan where she goes to China in one week or more than some weeks like maybe two weeks."

"I told you, Buddy. We're done with TV today."

"Mama, you are not my sweetheart!"

"I see."

"I command you out of the kitchen!"

"You want to try that again, Sir?"

"Now!"

"Robert Rosenberg..."

"You are not the boss, Mama! Darth Vader is the boss!"

"I'd like you to go out of the room and come back and try that again."

"Mama? I forgive you. You are my sweetheart and you can stay in the kitchen if you want to and you are the boss."

"I didn't do anything to be forgiven for."

"Okay. I'm sorry and then you can forgive me?"

"I forgive you."

"Thank you. I have to report to Darth Vader in my room right now. He is my other boss."

Secrets

1,000 words of Bob and Mia.

Four/4th

Bob rode his decorated bike in the Fourth of July parade.

He ate a hot dog and a chocolate cupcake with red, white and blue sprinkles at a friend's barbecue.

He participated in a number of squirt gun battles.

Laying on a blanket on the football field of the local high school, Bob watched fireworks for the first time.

"This fireworks noise hurts my ears but wow. Wow! It's red. Green! I didn't know there would be purple. There's purple! Wow! This is so cool. This is so cool. This is so cool. How do they get the fireworks up there? Is it a gun? Or a blaster? Or maybe a Storm Trooper. It must be someone with special powers that gets the fireworks up there - like a Storm Trooper or God or Batman. Yeah... it's probably Batman. Wow."

Wow.

Smacksy Sunday Links

I have always enjoyed a theme. Happy 4th of July, everyone.

The only Star Wars viewing currently sanctioned for our Star Wars obsessed yet Storm Trooper nightmare prone son is this clip on Youtube from the 1978 television gem, The Star Wars Holiday Special. It may not be scary to Bob, but I now have nightmares of my own.

Regretsy creator, pending bride, and all around awesome gal, April Winchell has a new column on Brides.com. It doesn't matter whether or not you are a bride, it is fantastic reading. Adore.

Catalog Living describes itself as, "A look into the exciting lives of the people who live in your catalogs." I describe it as the delightful site that will never again allow me to read a catalog without an urban-angst-make-believe-inner-dialogue. (I mean, in addition to the one that already exists on an endless loop in my brain.)

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Here, Kitty Kitty

There may be a new cat in the house but Pearl would like to remind you that she remains the alpha dog/cat.
Got that, everyone?

Modern Romance

Bob and Mia had a perfect playdate. Light saber fights and jumping on the bed. Sticker books and tricycle rides and everyone took a turn in the Yoda mask. There was an episode of Max and Ruby and a shared banana cut in pieces.

As playtime drew to a close, Mia put on her shoes and got ready to go. As Bob sat backwards on the couch talking to her, Mia reached out and in an instant Bob fell backwards slamming his head on the floor. As I recall from college, it's not really a party until someone is crying. Bob's wailing proved the rule.

Mia was horrified and fell into an epic shame spiral. Bob screamed. Mia's dad directed her to apologize. Mia yelled, "No! No! No! I don't want to be Bob's friend anymore!" Bob demanded to know why she hurt him "on purpose." I explained that it was an accident. He explained through gulping sobs that he would not forgive her. Ever. Mia and her dad and her baby brother managed to exit during the tumult. It was all quite Shakespearean.

Later that evening Bob announced at dinner that he had forgiven Mia and was ready to be friends again. A phone call was arranged.

"Hi Mia, I forgive you."

"I'm sorry Bob. I was just trying to kiss and hug you. I was trying to hug you all day."

"Okay. We can go to the park."

"Bob? Let's Skype*! Do you have Skype?"

"What?"

"Mia, we'll see Bob tomorrow morning at the park," said Mia's dad.

"Bye Bob!"

"Bye, Mia! Bye!"

And then guess which four year-old boy talked his father into downloading Skype?


*This is not an advertisement, merely a transcript.

The Look for Summer

The Birthday Suit.
(A classic.)