Friday, November 6, 2009

My Son the Doctor

I asked Bob what he would like to be when he grows up. He answered, “A grown up.” Excellent.
And then, “A Mama or a Daddy.”
Nice. And also, “A doctor. A doctor, teacher.”
He also informed me that, “Nurses take care of people and doctors fix people. I can fix you.” (How long I have waited to hear those exact words.)

This is a photo of Bob’s current favorite medical instrument:

The "Dad Golf Pro" half-golf ball shaped tape measure key chain, complete with a picture of a nine iron wielding Tasmanian Devil. (I'm pretty sure Tiger Woods uses this exact model.) Jeff won this at a ring-toss game at his office Halloween party. Re-read that last sentence. Ring toss? Exactly what kind of drunken frat house does he work for?

Bob uses the Tasmanian half-ball to measure our headaches and tummy aches. He will then diagnose our ailments as either, “big” or “not so big.”

Jeff’s current prescription, “Maybe a glass of juice or water will make you feel better, Daddy.” True enough.

For me, “Mama, you always like a kiss.” He has us figured out.

Our dog Daisy, “Wants a sandwich.” Always.

Pearl the cat, “Needs a privacy.” Wise words.

Note: Dr. Bob accepts insurance but is not currently on any managed care plans. Dr. Bob will validate parking.


  1. Do you think Dr. Bob would be willing to write me out of work for a month based on general malaise?

  2. Funny stories. I love stuff like this, because we all did it. I just wish I knew what I did. I remember using earmuffs my dad used when he went shooting as headphones, and pretending I could get radio stations on them...and sonetimes I would jog up and down the street, bobbing my head side to side like I'd seen my fitness-minded neighbors do each morning.

  3. Move over, Dr. Doogie! Dr. Bob is cuter, smarter, and believes in preventative medicin!

  4. brilliant. loved that. how come you always make me laugh out loud???