Summer Afternoon

When it's too hot outside and you've used up all your screen time and you already ate lunch and then finished a board game, then you read. *Extra points if you can spot Levi in this photo.

More Guy Talk

"Hey Felix? Did you see Alessandro's foot?"

"It looks like he hurt it pretty bad."

"I know. I was there when he fell and it was even bleeding through his sock."

"Wow. It must be pretty bad if he has to use crutches."

"Yeah... Hey Felix?"

"Yeah?"

"What if "crutches" were called "crotches?"

"Good one."

Bright Like A Diamond

"Hey, Felix? Is your dad's wedding ring really plain and gold?"

"Yeah, how'd you know that, Bob?"

"My dad's is too. What about you Desmond?"

"My mom and dad both have those."

"You guys? When I'm married, I want to have a diamond ring. Not just a plain one."

"Me too."

"Me too."

"We're going to be awesome!"

"Yeah!"

"Yeah!"

Oh, Nurse...

"Mom, I don't get it. After Ringo got a shot, he said it felt like a 'relaxing spa.' Mine sort of hurt a lot."

"Do you think he might have been joking?"

"He was for real and serious. Maybe it's because we have different doctors."

Ride On

photo: Katie Sokoler

"Mom, I'm going to go on all of the scary rides at the carnival that Pops wants to go on. I'm just going to take my throw up chances. I think I get about five of them. If I use up one of my throw up chances and barf it, it's definitely time to go home."

Who you gonna call?

 
"Bob, are you okay? What's all that noise in in your room?"

"I'm trying to grab a ghost!"

"Bob, what was that crash?"

"I got him!"

But Who's Counting?

"Are you taking a bath tonight, Bob?"

"No, not tonight."

"You sure about that?"

"Yeah, I only have about four dirty parts."

Fishes

 "Mom, Desmond got a new tadpole in the mail today."

"Very cool."

"Yeah, it even has part of a leg already. I was thinking we should get a goldfish, you know, to replace Violet."

"I don't know if anything could replace the cat."

"Yeah we can name him Max and he can live in my room because he'll probably be a boy. Not so cuddly, but more swimmy."

Under Cover

"What's that picture of Bob?"

"I made a girl with an X."

"Why?"

"It means no girls allowed."

"But most of your friends are girls."

"Sssh, Mom. That's a secret."

Of Course

"Mom, I just talked to Brandon on the phone."

"You did?"

"Yeah, on my invisible phone. We were planning  a Lego battle."

"Where are you going to have your Lego battle?"

"Nowhere, Mom. It's pretend."

Parry

"Mom, I think my head is too sweaty for doing face-mask fencing. Wanna feel?"

I'm Not Sure Either

"Mom? Will you step outside the kitchen?"

"What's going on?"

"I need a privacy for this fruit war."

Fencing: Class 2

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Bob's fencing coach addressed the class.

"Line up and follow my directions. First, put on your face masks. Once you have secured your face masks, only then are you allowed to pick up your eppe. Now follow my directions. Salute. Advance. Retreat. Advance. Retreat. Advance. Advance. Advance. Retreat. Advance. Retreat. Halt. Very good. Any questions? Yes, Bob?"

Bob raised his face mask just enough for his mouth to be visible and said, "It's hot under here."

First En Garde

"For this first épée fencing class, the beginners won't be using the equipment, we will be learning the basic footwork. We'll salute and advance and retreat. Any questions? Yes, Bob?"

"When do I get a sword?"

Bigger and Better

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"Hey, Mom? Can you open the garage door, please?"

"What's going on?"

"I'm building a Man Fortress in there. It's a fortress, for men like me and dad - and one lady - you."

Hey!

"Bob, please get your feet off the wall."

"Okay, Dad."

"Bob? What are you doing with the remote?"

"Nothing, Mom."

"Honey, please don't pull my bookmark out of the book."

"Hey! When is somebody going to like my behavior?"

Sound Advice

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"Mom? The other guys weren't being nice to Jason at school today."

"What happened?"

"They said they didn't want to play with him and then he looked sad like he was going to cry."

"Then what happened?"

"I went over to Jason and I said, 'Walk away, Jason. Just walk away.'"

"That's good advice honey."

"Yeah, he walked away. We played. There was no crying."

Check Up

"Mom? Why was Douglas from around the block at my dentist appointment?"

"He just happened to be at the dentist office for his appointment at the same time you were."

"But he watched my whole appointment."

"I think he wanted to see how a big boy like you acts at the dentist, Bob."

"I think he just wanted to watch that Winnie the Pooh movie that was on the TV in the ceiling over my lay-back chair."

Games

"Mom? You want to play a game?"

"Sure."

"I've got a good idea."

"Candy Land?"

"No, I was thinking about Hunter Jungle Spies Army Attack Team."

"I haven't heard of that one."

"I just made it up and it's awesome."

At the Bank

"Okay, Bob. I'm gonna need you to do good behavior while we're in the bank."

"I will."

"Bob, please take your mouth off of the stanchion thing."

"What's a stanchion?"

"Just take your mouth off of it and please don't hang on my purse. Can you get out from under my sweater please? Hand me my pen back please, I'm still writing with it. Bob? You said you were going to do good behavior in the bank."

"I super changed my mind."