Provenance

I'm on board with the one in, one out approach to keeping down clutter. Replacing instead of adding belongings is especially important because all two not small adults, one giant eleven-year-old, and two medium-ish dogs of us are sharing one 864 square foot house.

And yet... and yet. How do I account for the overflowing travel mug/water bottle cabinet? These two beat-to-hell water bottles do not "spark joy." They have ceased to be useful or beautiful and they are still here.

A much younger Bob created the Harry Potter and goldfish/baseball/scratch-that-out-and-start-that-triangle-over-right-here artwork on the bottles, but we have a lot of Bob's artwork. The bottles are leaky and smell like the indoor pool at the Y.

These bottles have been carried around in a Star Wars lunch box. They have been battered inside a Little League baseball bag. They have been used to dig sand and hold weeds that are pretending to be flowers. They are not history themselves but are witnesses.

I remind myself that I am a witness too as I carefully place the bottles in the trash.

Halloween/Taco Tuesday

This morning was the Halloween parade at elementary school. On the way in this morning, Bob and I talked about how we're both a little sad that this will be the last one for him/us.

I sat on a bench on the empty playground before the parade started while all of the kids went to their classrooms for attendance. A Rubik's Cube squeezed out of the office door clutching a late slip, and hobbled to his classroom.

It was drizzling, and the loud speaker played Thriller, the Harry Potter Theme, and the worst October earworm ever - Witches Brew. There was a parental paparazzi situation as we jostled each other, "On the other side of the cones please, parents!"

A squid, a unicorn, and a tree walk into a bar...

Yes. I will miss it.

Night Reading

His door was cracked open, so I looked in to check on him. I could have just stood there watching him all night but, you know, take a picture it lasts longer and all that.

101° in the Shade

I looked out the front window this afternoon and saw him. In the yard. With the hose. In his socks. Joy.

Slow it Down

"Mom? Can you please hold the elevator? I've got to look at this view."

So Many Questions

"Mom? Can I sit in your chair? Can I use your computer? Can I have a glass of water? Can you let Teddy in for me? Can you hand me my backpack? Could I have that sharpened pencil on the table? Can I watch the baseball card store guy on YouTube? Can I have some grapes? Oh wait, wait! Can I apply 'please' to all of that stuff?"

Request Denied

"Bob? I really need to squeeze your entire face."

"Nope."

5ft

"Good morning, Bud."

"Good morning, Mom. I'm pretty sure I grew over night. I feel taller."

"Okay, let's check."

"Am I?"

"Wow. You've grown half an inch in less than a month."

"Half an inch? That means I'm exactly five feet now. Have you noticed I'm growing up really fast?"

Blowing Out the Candles

"Did you make a wish, Dad? I didn't make a wish on my birthday because my life is already so good."

Ready

"So I can walk the last three blocks to school by myself?"

"Yes, but only cross the street where there are crossing guards."

"I know."

"What if a stranger tells you he needs help finding his puppy?'

"I yell, 'No!' and run in the opposite direction."

"What if a man who isn't dad, Felix's dad, or Desmond's dad offers you a ride?"

"I yell, 'No!' and run in the opposite direction."

"What if a guy tells you he has free cupcakes in the back of his white, unmarked van?"

"I yell, 'No!' and run in the opposite direction."

"Candy?"

"No!"

"Baseball cards?"

"No!"

"What if a lady has the same puppy/ride/cupcakes offer?"

"I yell, 'No!' and run in the opposite direction."

"Do all creeps look creepy?"

"No!"

"Can you do this?"

"I'm ready, Mom. I'm ten."

I See His Point

"Mom! You can't eat these animal crackers."

"Why?"

"Because you eat vegan."

"Do they have dairy in them, or something?"

"No, Mom. They're animals."

The Other Award

"Mom? You know the volunteering award you got at school? The flowers from it are going dead so I took a petal and put it in my lava rock box and wrote the name of your award on the top so you can keep it forever."

About Mr. Claus

"Mom? Do you think Santa just comes right through the front door since we don't have a chimney?"

"Yep."

"He must have a special key that opens every door in the whole world."

More Eavesdropping on the Fellas

"You know, Felix? I think if you fall down in heaven, you won't even hurt yourself."

"Yeah, you're right."

"Do you think animal heaven and people heaven is together?"

"Probably."

"I wonder what God's face looks like."

"I guess we'll find out one day, Bob."

The Club

"Mom? At school me and Andy and Ethan started a club. It's called The Character Club. Anyone can join, boys and girls, you just have to sign up on the paper we made. Our club spends our recess time doing good deeds. The last three days we picked up trash off the playground and we took Geon He to the nurse when he barfed."

Awwww

"Mom? What was the best thing that ever happened to you? Besides me?"

"Meeting Dad. What about you?"

"The best thing was probably when I figured out that you guys are my parents."

Happy

"Look what I found, Mom! It's a happy smiling guy! I found it just like this! It's a reminder from the world to be happy!"

Just Joy

"Mom! Look at this thing! Look  how cool this is! It's called a "sparkler!" Have you seen one of these before?"

Almost Summer

"Two more days, Mom. Two more days and I'll be done with second grade."

Like You Do

"Mom, I'm just going to stick my head out for a little breathing."