Check Please

"Dad? When is our dinner coming? When's my grilled cheese getting here?"

"We just ordered, Bob," said Jeff.

"It's going to be a few minutes," I said.

Bob slid out of his seat and under the table. In a moment, he reappeared on the other side of the table next to Jeff. Bob climbed on to Jeff's lap.

"Dad? Can I sit on your soldiers?"

"No, buddy."

"Your soldiers?" I said.

"He means shoulders."

"Oh. That was weird. I thought maybe 'soldiers' was a euphemism for your privates."

Jeff thought for a second. "No, but it is now."

Overheard at the Park

"J.P.? Where are the cup holders on this plane?"

Hi.

It's morning. I open my eyes. His face is inches from mine.

"Can we call Brandon today? Are we going to the park? Can I have just butter on my toast for breakfast? I don't want jam or peanut butter today but maybe a waffle instead of toast. Or how about pancakes? Just one pancake and a toast or can I have one of those tall cookies? I only need two of them. Is J.P. home? Instead of Max and Ruby I think I want Word Girl for my morning show. Do we still have the one about the science competition with the giant robot and the egg cutting thing? Did Mia come back from Chicago yet? Can I call her? Can we have Luis over? Can we call his mama or you can write her on the computer? Guess what? I have your phone. I'm going to take your picture. Right now. Now. Say cheese!"

"Good morning, Bob."

"Good morning, Mama."

Mammals

"So, Mom?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Can I touch your chest place private parts?"

"What's up?"

"Why do ladies have bigger those parts?"

"Those parts are breasts. They are designed for feeding babies. Lots of animals feed their babies that way."

"People aren't animals, Mama."

"We are, Bud. We're mammals."

"Oh."

"I fed you like that when you were a baby. You don't remember?"

"Mom?"

"Yes, Babe?"

"The truth is a robot cowboy."

"Alrighty."

The Word for the Day Is...

"So Mom? After this can we sit at my table and have lunch, you and me?"

"Sure. That sounds good."

"Yay! It'll be a jewbalunch."

"A jewbalunch?"

"Yeah. I heard it on Word Girl."

"That's not a real word, Babe."

"It is. The narrator said it."

"What does it mean?"

"Really so very happy. About lunch, I think."

"Maybe you mean jubilant."

"What does that word mean?"

"It means joyful, very happy."

"But not for lunch?"

"It could be but about lunch but it's not specifically about lunch."

"No. I'm jewbalunch."

"Me too, Bob."

Smacksy Sunday Links

Letters of Note blog describes itself as "... an attempt to gather and sort fascinating letters, postcards, telegrams, faxes, and memos. Scans/photos where possible..." It's like uncovering buried treasure everyday.

Everything about this site whispers sweet, sweet nothings to my OCD.

Oh my, the kid in this video. The sweetness of the poem and the sweetness of the boy. I found this little guy in a post on SAS' Magical Mystery Tour. Do you follow her? This gorgeous red head is a Kiwi living in London. She posts things funny, personal, interesting, pretty and just last Friday some photos of delightful underpants. Follow away, I tell you.

Happy Sunday.

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Still Life With R-2s by Bob

Today I discovered 271 pictures in my iphone photo album. I had taken eight of them. The other 263 had apparently been taken by my son. #255 is a view of Bob's bureau from the vantage point of a small-ish child balancing on his bed pillows.

Have a great Saturday. If you need me, I'll be re-charging my phone.