Monday, October 15, 2018


The Stonehenge project is complete. Mr. Rosenberg was compelled to sing "Stonehenge" from Spinal Tap all weekend. "... Stonehenge! Where the demons dwell. Where the banshees live and they do live well. Stonehenge! Where a man's a man and the children dance to the Pipes of Pan..."

Saturday, October 13, 2018

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Boats on the Bay

This week I read a gorgeous children's book. Boats on the Bay is written by Jeanne Walker Harvey and beautifully illustrated by our friend Grady McFerrin. This book will make a sweet holiday-birthday-something-gift for your favorite baby-toddler-youngster-person. 

Thursday, October 11, 2018

A Great Good Night

Tonight my friend Karen and I went to the Walt Disney Concert Hall in downtown LA. It was the first
time for the both of us.  It's pretty spectacular on the outside.

It's also pretty spectacular on the inside. This is what it looks like when the LA Philharmonic is warming up and you're trying to take a photo around the head of the guy in front of you who's wearing a hipster porkpie hat. The Disney Concert Hall was made even more spectacular on the inside with the presence of one of my favorite musicians, Andrew Bird. 

This is Andrew Bird. Mr. Bird is a singer-songwriter, violin player, and phenomenal whistler. I was first introduced to his music when I saw him in a short piece on a kid's show back in the early, sleep-deprived years of being Bob's mom.

Here he is as Dr. Strings back on Jack's Big Music Show on the Noggin Network. Remember Noggin? Me neither, but I don't remember anything from that year because, again, sleep-deprivation. We were all so much younger then, even Andrew Bird. Anyway, tonight he played with the Philharmonic and it was special. It was, dare I say, magical? Yes, I do dare. It was a little magical. 

Here he is singing some more grown-up music. You're welcome. 
(Magically welcome.)

Wednesday, October 10, 2018

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

The History of Standup

You should be listening to The History of Standup, a podcast from my friend Wayne Federman and his friend Andrew Steven. 

As it says in the podcast description, "Comedian Wayne Federman teaches Andrew Steven about the history of standup in a casual, conversational history class, looking over some of comedy’s most interesting moments. From Vaudeville to Netflix, we look back at the evolution of standup comedy."

It's funny and fascinating and available on iTunes and what are you waiting for?

Sunday, October 7, 2018

Saturday, October 6, 2018

Smacksy Saturday Photo: Supplies

Today: Six pounds of clay and eight sheets of green felt
Monday the 15th by sixth period Ancient Civ class: Stonehenge

Friday, October 5, 2018

On It

It wasn't until just today that I realized I've been using a WTF planner. 

Thursday, October 4, 2018

My New Rock

Yesterday I was at the hippie crystal store with some girlfriends and I bought this rock. It's called Peacock Ore but it 100% looks like a rock from the parking lot someone spray painted and threw some glitter on. But it isn't. Probably.

The internet says, Peacock Ore is also known as Bornite - a copper iron sulfide mineral commonly found in hydrothermal veins and contact metamorphic rocks which tarnishes to iridescent shades of blue, purple, green and gold. 

Sure is pretty. For a rock. 

Wednesday, October 3, 2018

Thirty-Five Short Years Ago

In 1983 I had a friend who came to Hollywood from the South Bronx to promote Wild Style a film about hip hop, break dancing, and graffiti artists. Kenny, aka Almighty Kay Gee, was a member of the rap group Cold Crush Brothers featured in the movie. They were in town for a week, performing at clubs.

My roommate Bob and I were living in a little yellow house on Bundy Drive in West LA at the time. Kenny was at our place one afternoon and recorded an outgoing message on the answering machine in our kitchen. Within a few days, the message went low-key-1983 viral. It started with a few random hang ups and built to a fever pitch of people calling just to listen to the message. They would sometimes laugh or applaud or yell out, "I love your message!" before hanging up.

I'm no rapper, but I can still recite it by heart.

You've reached Bob and Lisa's answering machine
I'm Kay Gee from the Cold Crush, if you know what I mean
This machine right here could never ever be the whack
So leave your number and your name and they'll call you right back
And you can't beat that and you know you can't
You know you can't beat that with a baseball bat
Huh huh huh huh

Tuesday, October 2, 2018

Week Two

Week two is complete in my Book-a-Week Rosh Hashana Resolution Situation. I finished this book I started earlier in the summer but hadn't made it back to.

I've been reading Elizabeth Willard Thames' financial blog, Frugalwoods, for a number of years and I'm a big fan. Her book is more memoir than financial advice which makes sense since she's not a financial expert and her current financial habits are already published pretty explicitly online. She chronicles her move from single yuppie to married homesteader with self awareness and humor.
Thumbs up and stuff.

Friday, September 28, 2018

Because I Love You, I Give You, Hollyhock Salad Dressing

When I was in Canada a few weeks back, at Hollyhock Center on Cortes Island, there was gorgeous scenery. One of the most gorgeous scenes of all was the salad dressing on the table at lunch and dinner. They have a phenomenal garden at Hollyhock and the simple garden greens dressed with this stuff were amazing. I think I've posted maybe one other recipe on Smacksy in the past billion years. That's how important this salad dressing is, you guys.

There's barely any left, of course.

This recipe is from their cookbook, Hollyhock Cooks.

1/3 cup cider vinegar
1/3 cup water
1/3 cup tamari
1-4 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 cup nutritional yeast flakes
1 1/2 cup vegetable oil

Place cider vinegar, tamari, garlic and nutritional yeast in a blender and combine. With blender running, pour in oil to reach desired consistency. Lasts for 2 weeks if refrigerated.

You're welcome.


Like this.

You know those nights? The ones where you can't stop thinking and your thoughts wake you up at 2:40 AM and then never let you go back to sleep ever so you're a non-brain-eating zombie the next day? That's my story. Scrolling through my photos today I found some evidence that my phone was maybe a little zombified too since I didn't take any of these photos on purpose.


Well composed and extremely flattering.

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Tuesday, September 25, 2018

This Book I Read

I'm following up here on my Rosh Hashana resolution to read a book a week. So.
I read a book last week.

I finished Nikki Nash's, 72 Raisins, three days ago and I haven't stopped thinking about it. It's a story of one man's search for meaning and it's funny and warm and sometimes creepy with interesting characters and a few well-placed plot twists. Anytime a book follows me around, days after I put it down, it's a good thing. This book is a good thing.

I am a fan of in-real-life Nikki Nash and I am not being compensated for this review.

Monday, September 24, 2018

Monday Night

"Have a good practice, Bob."

"Okay, Mom. You going to watch the game for me?"


"Thanks. Tell the Rockies I love 'em."

Friday, September 21, 2018

Do You Remember the 21st Night of September? (I Do)

Today is the fourteen-year anniversary of my first date with Mr. Rosenberg. (Yay!)
In celebration, I have two links for you. (More yay!)
First, please re-enjoy a brief summary of the summer of first dates that got me to the best one.
Then, because the actual calendar date is in the first line, dance to this goodness.

Thursday, September 20, 2018

Wednesday, September 19, 2018


His position seems uncomfortable to me but then, I haven't done it. Yet.

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

A Pre-Coffee Walk

The morning after a storm, walking down to breakfast. Yes. I do miss it.

Monday, September 17, 2018

When Mom Gets Back in Town

"Those flowers are beautiful honey, thanks."

"Yes, welcome home. We made you this grand display."

Friday, September 14, 2018


This tradition of taking your shoes off before going inside, how can I get the dogs to comply?

Wednesday, September 12, 2018


Today I made the trip to Cortes Island in British Columbia in a fun-sized teensy plane. The views were spectacular. I somehow managed to fall asleep during most of it, but the part I did stay awake for was pretty great. 

Tuesday, September 11, 2018

Monday, September 10, 2018


It's Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. I've decided to make a Rosh Hashanah resolution. I am going to read a book a week. This will be a drastic change from my current reading pattern of not even close to a book a week. I will let you know how it's going. And what I'm reading. And what I think of what I'm reading. L'Shanah Tovah Tikatevu. (May you be inscribed (in the book of life) for a good year.) (Books are a theme, I guess.)

Friday, September 7, 2018

Line of Questioning

"Hey, Mom."

"Hey, Bob."

"What's that wreath for?"

"No reason. Just a wreath."

"No, I mean what holiday?"

"It's just to decorate the door."

"But that's not a holiday."

"Bob, why are you the wreath police all of a sudden?"

"It's not sudden, Mom. There's usually a real wreath reason."

Thursday, September 6, 2018


Teddy has his own tea towel, gifted by a friend who knows our situation.

Wednesday, September 5, 2018

Those Eyes

I'm pretty sure when they talk about "limpid pools" they have this guy in mind.

Tuesday, September 4, 2018

Box of 1990 Unopened Packs

When your mom's friend goes to yard sales and cool swap meets on the weekends and keeps an eye out for you, your baseball card collection RULES. (So does your mom's friend.)

Monday, September 3, 2018


I'm a few days late on this, but I finally noticed it's September. This is my favorite month and so far, September has been playing along.

Friday, August 31, 2018

A Clearing

Today I did a lot of things. One of the things I did was sit in the sun, feel the breeze and just do that. This is noteworthy in that it happens more rarely than it should. Perhaps this is true for you too. Let's get this situation sorted.

Thursday, August 30, 2018

Inhale Deeply

You may not be here, looking at this, but inhale deeply anyway. You can close your eyes if you'd like. Maybe do that three times. Trust me on this.

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

I Never Take the Five

When I moved away from home at seventeen, I moved from a beach town surrounded by forest to the glittery desert of Southern California. For the thirty or so years that my mom remained in Santa Cruz, I would drive every few months up the coast to visit. Leave on a Friday, return on a Sunday. Driving Highway Five is a shorter route, one I always describe as sensory deprivation road, dirt and fields and a terrible cattle yard. I have always avoided the five in favor of the meandering 101. It takes a little longer but it's the road to home.

Today I will leave on a solo drive to Pescadero, a small village on the coast, an hour south of San Francisco. I will drive the highway that rolls through seaside towns and inland hills. Six road trip hours of windy road and small town places to stop for coffee or a taco or something from the bakery case at the oddball, rococo Madonna Inn.


The place where central California cracks into Northern Cal, where looking up means seeing the point in the sky where the morning fog meets sky-scraping redwoods and if majestic could also be a way to describe a smell. It's all ocean spray and the sound of sand in the clothes dryer. It's a crumbling cement ship and a pier to nowhere.

When I see photos of green places, wild places, coastal Scotland and cliffs of Ireland, I always think yes this is gorgeous. Yes and have you driven the 101?

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

A Room With a View (My View)

The people and animals in the house know that the big chair in the living room is my chair. It's my base of operations. It's where I'm sitting now. From the big chair I can see easily see two-thirds of the house at a glance, living room, kitchen, dining room, front door and front window. The view out the front window is our yard, the sidewalk, the street and the neighborhood beyond. Lovely. Bucolic, in a severely suburban way. I am the monarch of all I survey. Obviously.

And, then the sign happened.

I sat down in the big chair with my coffee, early Sunday morning. I looked outside the front window and my gaze was instantly met with a hideous, yellow sign advertising "We Buy Houses" with an 800 number. The sign was on the telephone pole across the street, hung high to discourage removal. Destroying the view, my lovely view. No. This would not stand.

CUT TO: Mr. Rosenberg (tall - 6'4" Mr. Rosenberg) on a step stool attempting to pull down the sign but cant't quite reach it.

CUT TO: Mr. Rosenberg on a ladder he's dragged across the street, attempting to rip the (extremely sturdy) sign down with his bare hands.

CUT TO: An increasingly irritated Mr. Rosenberg attempting to pry the (awful, dreaded) sign off of the pole with a hammer. My coffee and I watched from the front window but pretended we didn't.

CUT TO: A now incensed Mr. Rosenberg (quietly incensed, it is Mr. Rosenberg after all) attempting to destroy the sign with a wrench and hammer combination.

The wrench/hammer/curse words combo did the trick. The sign was wrestled successfully into one of our garbage bins.  Victory was ours.

And forty minutes later, peace is restored to the kingdom. (The suburban kingdom.)

Monday, August 27, 2018