Monday, January 27, 2014

Fragile


Saturday, I received tragic news about a childhood friend. There was a time in the past that we were inseparable.  Distanced as we were by miles and time, the news still took my breath away. I was punched in the stomach by the fragility of life. I wondered why I must always wait for a sad surprise to honor that fragility. 

In my head I get it that our time here is finite and transitional. Intellectually I understand the importance of being in the moment. Still, living in each individual slice of time and holding it fast to my heart, is an awareness that will quickly slide away with the introduction of a to-do list, or a stack of laundry waiting to be folded. “Real life” shows up and I forget to notice the now and I’m back in the race.

I find myself taking for granted the spaces that make up a day, sometimes even willing the clock to move faster to get me to the finish line. To accept the gift of twenty-four hours I must shift my focus, see each minute as sacred, each action intentional. 

I would like to look up and take notice of my time without dissecting it into columns of good and bad; shine an accepting light on all of it. It is easy to hold close the sweetness and joy, listening to my son read, or holding hands with my husband. But just as important, the boring and the monotonous must turn into rituals to be celebrated like candles on a cake. I will brush my hair. I will park the car. I will make coffee. I will open the mail and I will feel gratitude. Each minute is full and valuable. I want to show up for all of that.

Today I will fill myself up with my loved ones. Today I will also show up for sadness and welcome it in. My heart is heavy with the space left behind in the world by my friend but the beauty of grief is that it proves you love something fiercely enough to miss its presence.



35 comments:

  1. Yes, it's hard to remember, hour to hour or day to day or even for many weeks--- and then something will remind us, at dear cost, of the incredibly
    precious opportunity in each minute. Thank you for sharing this, and I'm sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  2. And that's the only kind of good that can come from this kind of news. I'm so sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm so sorry for the loss of your dear friend, Lisa. But I'm grateful for the wisdom in this beautiful post.

    Wishing you peace and comfort, today and always.

    XOXO
    Anna

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm so very sorry for your loss, Lisa. May you find comfort in your memories and peace in each breath.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm praying for everyone involved, Lisa. Holding all of you in my arms virtually.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. I will carry your words with me through the moments of this day. Love and peace to you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Beautifully written...thank you...

    ReplyDelete
  8. To love something fiercely enough to miss it's presence. That's a goal for life in and of itself. Beautifully put. I'm so sorry for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  9. It seems to me that the older we get, the more losses we experience. And it never gets any easier. I am sorry, Lisa. You give good advice. Try to be here in this moment and love your people with all your heart.

    ReplyDelete
  10. What beautiful words Lisa. All of them. Hugs to you for your loss.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Loving my people today...fiercely. Thank you for the reminder. I'm also sending love to you and your friend. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Having experienced the same thing not long ago I feel your pain and heartache. You have my deepest condolences and friendship. I feel great loss at the idea that part of my childhood is now only remembered by me but at the same time I take great comfort in those memories. I hope you can find solace in your memories as well. Peace be with you.

    ReplyDelete
  13. So beautifully expressed, and so true. Thank you.

    My condolences for the loss of your friend, Lisa.

    Arohanui x

    ReplyDelete
  14. Yes. There's nothing to say more but that I know how you feel. And that thing that has no words at all.

    ReplyDelete
  15. So very sorry, Lisa. (I left two comments before, I think they're going to spam) But wanted to try again, because I am thinking of you. Thank you for your writing.

    ReplyDelete
  16. <3 <3 <3 Your words touched me deeply. You are in my highest thoughts and prayers. <3 <3 <3

    ReplyDelete
  17. asics,asics israel,asics shoes,asics running shoes,asics israel,asics gel,asics running,asics gel nimbus,asics gel kayano
    oakley sunglasses, http://www.oakleysunglasses-wholesale.us.com/
    coach outlet store, http://www.coachoutletonline-store.us.com/
    michael kors outlet online, http://www.michaelkorsoutletonlinestores.us.com/
    true religion jeans outlet, http://www.truereligionjeansoutlets.us.com/
    beats by dre, http://www.beatsbydrdre-headphones.us.com/
    chanel handbags outlet, http://www.chanelhandbags-outlet.us.com/
    ray-ban sunglasses, http://www.rayban-sunglassess.us.com/
    michael kors handbags, http://www.cheapmichaelkorshandbag.in.net/
    michael kors outlet, http://www.michaelkorsfactoryoutlets.in.net/
    michael kors wallet sale, http://www.michaelkorswallet.net/
    karen millen uk, http://www.karenmillendressesoutlets.co.uk/
    tiffany outlet, http://www.tiffanyjewelleryoutlets.co.uk/
    michael kors handbags outlet, http://www.michaelkorshandbagsoutletstore.us.com/
    chanel handbags outlet, http://www.chanelhandbagsoutlet.in.net/
    ray-ban sunglasses, http://www.ray-bansunglasses.eu.com/
    mlb jerseys, http://www.cheapmlbjerseys.us.com/
    ugg outlet store, http://www.uggoutletstore.eu.com/
    cheap ugg boots, http://www.uggbootscheap.eu.com/
    1017minko

    ReplyDelete