Monday, September 17, 2012

Resolutions: 5773 Edition


It's Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. As a Jew-adjacent, I am spending part of my day in reflection and have come up with a few things I would like to do differently going forward in 5773...

I will no longer shriek, "Tea towel! Tea towel!" at Mr. Rosenberg when he mops up spilled coffee with the decorative towels that live on the oven door. He's right: towels should earn their rent doing towel things, not just hanging out looking cute.

I will read books of my choosing and at my leisure, and not merely pull an all-nighter the twenty-four hours before my book club meets.

I will not walk through our house without wearing shoes or hard-soled slippers with which to repel Legos. Getting from one side of Bob's bedroom to the other is akin to crossing a bed of hot coals without the spiritual experience that Tony Robbins promises. Dearforms are my co-pilot.

I will wash the station wagon before Bob's friend Dustin feels the need to announce how filthy it is to the rest of the kindergarten class at circle time.

I will close my computer when I am not using it in order to keep the cat from standing on my keyboard. Facebook has seen my last, "aklurdghfioauertow83kJSJDFJJSHJ99999999999999," status update. You're welcome.

L 'Shana Tovah Everybody!





16 comments:

  1. L'Shana Tovah, Rosenbergs!

    Thanks for the cat/Facebook clarification; If I'd seen that, I would have called emergency services.

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  2. L'Shana Tovah from my family to yours!

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  3. Happy New Year! Great resolutions.

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  4. Lisa, you're so funny.

    Dearforms and crocs are my co-pilos.

    xo

    This was adorable.

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    1. Thanks, Alexandra! Yes, Crocs are a necessary evil.

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  5. Ha! So my husband isn't alone in his inappropriate use of the good towels!

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    1. I am going to release the good towels to the universe and only cringe a little when I see them mopping up cat barf off the floor.

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  6. For some reason, Jewish new year's resolutions always seem so much more doable than New Year's resolutions... Happy, healthy, sweet new year! Looking forward to more Smacksy excellence in 5773.

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  7. I think that us women may have as many words for rags, wash clothes, tea towels etc., as Eskimos have for snow.

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  8. Lisa...your posts are always very interesting...I like the way you add details of your hobbies above..just keep sharing with us your beautiful aspects..

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  9. These sound doable and sensible to me.

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  10. Vi on the computer is a riot. And you as a "Jewish adjacent" made me LOL.

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