Thursday, October 26, 2017

Winter is Coming

"Baby? Sorry to wake you up so early but how do I get that plastic thing to stick on my face?"

"Spirit gum."

"Spirit what?"

"Gum. Spirit gum. It's what they use to stick special effect prosthetics to your face."

"Do you have that?"



"I'll get up."

"I'll make you some coffee."

This is how Thursday began.

The company where Mr. Rosenberg works make a gigantic deal out of Halloween. The different teams pick themes and then characters are assigned. There are group performances and themed workspace decor. This year Mr. Rosenberg's team picked Game of Thrones and he was assigned the giant, scarred, assassin, Sandor Clegane - a man known as The Hound. The celebration was today.

The Hound

Some weeks back, Mr. R purchased and $8 "Hound" facial-burn-scar rubber prosthetic. I ordered a Party City knight costume and plastic sword for him online. We hauled out the crappy witch wig left over from Bob's Black Sabbath themed 7th birthday party. The components were assembled.

The knight shirt was too small. Mr. Rosenberg walked out of the bedroom trapped in the knight shirt with his head stuck inside and his arms sticking straight up over head. We yanked him out of it and cut the back of the shirt to fit. I snipped handfuls of weird plastic hair off of the wig and slimed it up with cheap styling paste that Bob keeps for when he wants to smooth his hair down. We used mascara to turn Mr. R's grey whiskers brown. With no way to adhere the plastic scar to his face, I stapled the scar to the skull cap of the wig.

"You've never looked more Jewish."


"Kind of like Harry Shearer in Spinal Tap."

"Totally what I was going for."

"I recommend you take your sword out of your belt before you try to get in the car."

"'It gives me joy to kill people.'"

"Have a good day!"