Wednesday, July 15, 2009

37 Ways We Are Screwing Him Up


Following is a list of nicknames we use for our three-year-old son Bob.

The Bob
Blob
Baba
Boots
Mr. Rosenbee
Pooman
The Poomanian
Poomie
Pooch
Pootie
Shmoomie
Shmoops
Shmee
Shmeeps
Smoochman
Noodleman
Midge
Smidge
Smidgey
Mr. Butts
Squirrely
Squirrely McButts
Sneaky Pete
Rascalman
Mr. Whinerton
Whineman
Crabby McWhineypants
The Scream
Buddy McButts
Snuggy Snugs
Cuddleman
Pantsy Poopington
Mr. Babyman
Nicey Niceington
Mr. Nice Guy
Mr. No Pants
Bob Nakedman, Attorney at Law, LLC

If you ask him who he is, he will say, “I am Baba Woesenbuhg.”
If you ask him what he is, he will say, “I am a boy and also a Pooman.”

I think our job is done here.

4 comments:

  1. With my vast experience of crappy mothering, I can just tell you that it doesn't really matter. They will all end up spilling their guts on a psychologist's couch.

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  2. LOL. That is quite a list.

    I'm still giggling at "The Poomanian"

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  3. Excellent! I still can't manage to call my girl by her given name. Our list is just as long, and changes as she does. It looks as though, despite the apparent damage of confused identity, she may turn out unharmed. Keep up the good work.

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