Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Robot Plans: A One Act

Robot Schematic Diagram; First Draft by Bob and Daddy

ROBOT PLANS
BOB and DADDY sit on the floor of Bob's room loading blocks, Legos and assorted finger-puppets into the back of a battery operated dump truck.


BOB

Daddy? I need to build a robot.


DADDY

Oh?


BOB

I want to make a robot today. 



DADDY
You know Uncle Andy builds robots. That’s his job.


BOB
What kinds of robots?


DADDY
Well, he builds robots for rocket ships.


BOB
OK but I don't need the rocket ship yet. Just the robot. Can we build a robot with him? I want one.



DADDY
Let's call Uncle Andy.


(DADDY presses speed dial 5.)

UNCLE ANDY
Hello?


DADDY

It’s your brother-in-law and also your nephew. You're on speaker.


BOB

Uncle Andy! I need to build a robot with you now.



UNCLE ANDY
Hi Bob. 
What kind of robot?


BOB

A good robot, not a bad one. I want a nice robot that does not break things. And it brings snacks. I want a nice robot that will bring snacks.


END SCENE

NOTE: Later that evening, Daddy Googled "snack robot" and finds the following image on a site called Technabob. I think Bob's on to something.

9 comments:

  1. That's brilliant. Who wouldn't you want someone who's lacking the ability to judge and criticize, delivering your snack food? It's the perfect mix. HAL, bring on the cheetos and Pepsi!

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  2. That's what kids are for - to get us snacks.

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  3. this is an open call to anyone who can help us make snackbot a reality in our house.

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  4. A snack bot would be awesome! You could even program it to keep other people out of YOUR chocolate/special cookies/etc. That would be the best!

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  5. I'D LIKE TO OFFICIALLY PRE-ORDER THE SNACKBOBNOW VERSION 1.0, PLEASE.

    I'M GLAD IT'S A NICE ROBOT. WOULDN'T BE VERY NICE IF YOU GOT A CHOCOLATE AND THEN BITCH SLAPPED.

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  6. I'm actually really glad that he thought of a robot to bring snacks because I've often had the inclination to smack sense into my boys when they say things like "I need to get married so that my wife will bring me things."

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  7. Genius!

    And I could seriously use a snack robot, too :)

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  8. On a site called TechnaBOB? I not only think he is on to something, I think he is up to something.

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