Tuesday, June 30, 2009

White Flag

One of the lingering vestiges of my former Hollywood life is my thrice annual fancy Beverly Hills hair appointment. (It’s all about the highlights, friends.) At my last appointment, as I sat under the dryer with the obligatory fountain of tin foil squares shooting from my scalp, I couldn’t help but notice that as far as fashion goes, there was a definite “look for summer” going on. I was not sporting it.

The 90210 gals were wearing tight, straight leg jeans or kicky little (So little!) skirts, fun ruffle trimmed t-shirts and sweet sandals. I glanced down at my own fetching ensemble of borderline mom jeans, t-shirt-I-slept-in and pleather Target flats. I am certainly not in competition with the shiny young crowd but, nevertheless, I had still hoped to avoid the look of the I-Gave-Up-Mom.

You know the I-Gave-Up-Mom type. You’ve seen her in stretched out yoga pants crawling along behind a “jogging” stroller through the park. She's the one wearing bedroom slippers, bribing her howling toddler with free cake samples at Trader Joe’s. She's the new mom at pre-school who in just a week, has earned the nickname "the-one-in-the-blue-t-shirt". Oh crap. That’s me.

I admit that I am currently fashion unconscious. Bob is three-years-old and I still have two maternity tops in my wardrobe rotation. I have no defense except, you know, I'm...um... busy? It’s not good, dude.

If I make the move to ditch all the ill fitting pants, pill-y sweaters and weird underpants, I will have to walk around half-naked most of the time. It’s taken four years to destroy my style motivation and beat most of the cute stuff out of my wardrobe. Because I am only moderately inspired to improve the situation and also don’t plan on throwing a big wad of cash at this fashion crisis, it could be a long, unflattering road back.


  1. i still cry (from laughing) when i see that clip. you are so funny. and i had a similar thought almost a year ago when i caught myself sifting through my drawer of jeans looking for the 9" zipper fronts, because "it feels good to be so squeezed in". not good.

  2. You know it is hard to be a balance between a cool mum and an inappropriate mum....some of the stuff I used to wear pre-my little vegemite, is no longer appropriate as a mum.....I feel anyway......but then I don't want to be the mum you mentioned either......you made me laugh because I completely know the mums you are referring to...

  3. I don't know whom you would be referring to. Maybe the crazy mom in the JCPenney long Mom shorts and Old Navy t-shirt who is smiling right now just because she showered before noon today. Perhaps the same mom who feels like she's done her hair because she swept it back into a ponytail.

    I'm glad I'm not that mom.

    By the way, I like my granny panties just fine.

  4. oh, this is a good one. I just discovered my pre preg tupperware bins in the basement. It was like I had a whole new wardrobe that just doesn't quite fit yet. I'm squeezing myself into said new wardrobe so I don't have to look at my old crap anymore.

  5. I love wearing the t-shirt I slept in, outside in the light, for everyone to see.....and no one to know but me!!!! :)

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